100 Posts: What's an *51?

Well, the counter on my Blogger page tells me this is my 100^th post, going back to that test Onslaught entry I did without ever sharing the link (but which still has gotten more views than my harrowing SimCopter adventure).

In years past of my comic fandom, an occasion like this would have called for some shiny foil, maybe a hologram or whatever the heck chromium is. But I guess I'll have to settle here for a brand spanking new logo.

This was designed by my Support Group co-creator Nathan Arnold, who helped transform my collection of wannabe superheroes from ideas rattling around in my head to flesh-and-blood (well, pencil-and-paper) characters who looked better than I could have imagined. He's also a heck of a friend and was kind enough to whip this up and deliver it to me on my birthday.

It looks great, but what does it mean?

The * portion is an homage to one of the things I love most about comics – the asterisks directing readers to editor's notes that explain a particular detail, often by referring us to the issue where what's being referenced happened. Even if I never followed up, these simple annotations let me know the issue I'd stumbled upon at a flea market or Waldenbooks was part of a rich tapestry of characters and storytelling.

For example, this panel and the helpful editor's note from Darkhawk #13, drawn by Mike Manley

When I was trying to come up with a name for this blog, I thought about “Evansville,” which might have been slightly topical while “Smallville” was on the air. With apologies to Belinda Carlisle, I briefly considered “Ooh, Evan is a Guy on Earth.”

Although comics aren't all I write about, they're a big part of it, so I thought about doing something with asterisks. My first idea was “Asterisk Management,” but that was in use by a couple of different businesses. I didn't think they would be sharing posters for never-released “Free Willy” sequels or reading the CapWolf saga issue by issue, but it seemed like a good idea to try something else.

I picked 51 because it's the number of my favorite Psalm, and with the asterisk it sounded like “Area 51,” which is weird and hopefully kind of memorable.

Despite being raised in the church, as a kid, my initial understanding of Heaven and Hell was the pretty basic “Do good stuff and go to Heaven, do bad stuff and go to Hell.” I knew we prayed to God for forgiveness, but I still had that tally sheet or scales idea in the back of my mind. And even though I thought I was and wanted to try to be a good person, I kept doing bad things, intentionally or unintentionally. Sure, sometimes I could say I was sorry or correct it, but that didn't always feel like enough. I couldn't undo everything, and I worried that would add up.

I discovered Psalm 51, which was written by King David after he'd screwed up worse than anything I had managed to do at that point in my youth. This was a guy who God made king of Israel, who the Bible describes as a man after God's own heart... and he not only had an affair with a married woman (when he already had multiple wives) but he arranged to have her husband, Uriah, an all-around good dude, killed in battle so he wouldn't be found out!

The prophet Nathan (lotta good guys named Nathan) confronted David about this, and David realized his goose was cooked. He couldn't un-kill Uriah. He'd been blessed by God throughout his life, spiritually and materially, but he saw a pretty woman and became a moron.

Psalm 51 was his response, calling on God for mercy and forgiveness that he did not, and could not, deserve.

The Old Testament prescribed a series of sacrifices the Israelites could bring to atone for their sins. It was pretty gruesome stuff, with the sheep and the bulls and the goats. But how much livestock does it take to square not only sleeping with a guy's wife, getting her pregnant and then killing the guy, but also being one of the people most blessed by the Creator of Everything and going, “Eh, not enough”?

Verses 16 and 17 hit me when I read them and have stuck with me since:

“You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it; you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings. 
My sacrifice, O God, is a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart you, God, will not despise.”

David couldn't erase what he'd done with any amount of sacrifice. I couldn't be good enough or work hard enough to undo all the mistakes I had made and have made since and sadly even will continue to make. But I felt that broken and contrite heart, and God would not despise it.

Sin separates us from God. But God made a way to reunite us, not because we deserve it but because it's His will, His heart to do so. He sent his Son to take on our sin and die in our place on the cross. Then He rose from the dead and offers forgiveness to all who trust Him, then empowers us to turn away from our sin.

“For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.” (John 3:16-17)

I write here about comics and movies and moments in movies I can't get over and names of football teams and characters having a Disney+ moment getting stuck in awkward situations. Most of it's ridiculous and hopefully fun. But sometimes I might sneak or stumble into something more serious.

If you're reading this, I hope you enjoy the weird stuff, but more importantly, I hope you know that you're loved by and precious to the God of this entire universe. And if you don't know that or don't believe it, I still love you and want to laugh about weird comic and pop culture stuff with you, while still praying that you do come to know that truth. Not because I care about being right. But because I want you to have the same peace in your heart that I've been blessed to find.

And I want to chat about Doctor Bong with you in Heaven.