Secret Defenders #7: Xandu Knows Best

Secret Defenders #7
“The Queen, My Lord, is Dead"
Writer: Roy Thomas
Penciler: Andre Coates
Inker: Fred Fredericks
Letterer: Clem Robins
Colorist: John Kalisz
Editor: Mike Rockwitz
Group Editor: Ralph Macchio
Editor-in-Chief: Tom DeFalco
Released: July 13, 1993

For the first time in nearly 30 years, I'm reading an issue of “Secret Defenders” for the very first time. It should become a more common experience, as my intent is to go all the way through the series. I really hope things don't go downhill and make me regret all those dollar-bin* purchases to complete this collection.

As I mentioned before, issue 6 was the last one I bought as it was being published. My memory hasn't jogged enough to recall if this was a budgetary decision, if I lost interest because of the “classic” lineup or maybe it just wasn't being carried anymore in my area.

Captain America has bigger problems as this issue opens, with the unnatural storm being stirred by Xandu's use of the Wand of Watoomb. Cap and the police remain confused as to why he was benched by Dr. Strange last issue, but the Star-Spangled Avenger knows he still has a job to do.

Over in the Death Dimension, Xandu has Spider-Man, the Scarlet Witch and Strange doing his bidding – or rather three skeletal denizens of said Death Dimension doing posthumous cosplay. Turns out the actual heroes are being held prisoner by a veritable valley of dry bones while Xandu explains his plan to merge Earth and the Dimension of the Deceased.

And somehow, maybe, this will fix the problem in which he and his beloved Melinda can't coexist on the same plane because they, um, share a death? I don't really get it, but as comic book magic logic goes, OK. Oh, and just to show he's not at all a power-mad egolomaniac, he's going to name the new world Xandu.

In what seems like a bit of standard villain overconfidence, he releases the heroes into the Death Dimension's wilderness. But actually there's a method to this portion of his madness, as the demonic denizens of the dimension aren't too keen on him maybe destroying their realm. So he figures chasing prey will give them something to occupy their time.

The heroes' powers and abilities aren't operating at peak efficiency in the Death Dimension. Spider-Man's spider-sense doesn't even register before a slimy tentacle reaches out from a nearby body of water to ensnare the Scarlet Witch, and they literally subdue the creature with sticks and stones (really big ones). Strange interprets the inverted card referenced last issue to mean the mistake he would make was leaving Cap behind, as he's a better natural fighter than any of them.

The heroes lose their demonic pursuers and double back to Castle Skull, where Xandu is busy magicking the two realms together. Melinda has snapped out of her trance, because story magic, and implores Xandu to cease his evil scheme. But he's in love, and he's already got the name picked out, so he's not going to let the ravings of a hysterical woman change his mind. (That's how he sees it. I'm inclined to go with Melinda on this one.)

Just then, the Secret Defenders burst in and... well, Spider-Man gets in Strange and Scarlet Witch's way, so their magic doesn't magic the way they wanted. Xandu brushes off Strange's warnings about destroying one or both worlds because, I mean, he's smart. And he really wants to be right.

Back on Earth, the cemetery next door to the asylum where Xandu was locked up that got stiffly referenced earlier in the issue comes into play as the dead start to rise. The only person between them and the rest of New York – Captain America. It's not exaclty facing off with an Infinity Gauntlet-wielding Thanos, but you know Steve Rogers isn't backing down, no matter how bleak the situation looks. I half expected him to assure the zombies that he could do this all day.

The stage is set for the finale, which I really hope keeps the promised title on the final page: Death and Taxis.

This one started a little slow for me and, like the previous installment, didn't feel quite as weird and offbeat as I was hoping. But it picked up steam and didn't feel like a boilerplate, magical catastrophe story. The main trio's powers failing them added some intrigue and, while I'm certain it will involve some magical logic that only works for this story, I'm looking forward to seeing how things wrap up.

The letters page has a few proposed lineups, and our Suggested Secret Defenders of the Week are the eclectic trio of Sersi, Iceman and Deathlok, from Matthew Davidson of Nova Scotia. That's an unexpected grouping that could definitely make for some interesting action and interaction.

* - Or $2